Whats Your Rashee

Rating : 6/10
Release Date : 25th Sep, 2009
Time : ~220 minutes
Director & Co-writer : Ashutosh Gowariker; Co-Writer : Naushil, based on the novel Kimball Ravenswood by Madhu Rye; Music : Sohail Sen
Starring : Priyanka Chopra, Harman Baweja, Aanjjan Shrivastava, Darshan Jariwala
I think it’s the weight of expectation, after all its an Ashutosh Gowariker film, that makes us first pick the flaws rather than applaud the things he got right. So, true to my nature, I will go against the trend and begin with the positives. First, you’ve got Priyanka Chopra, who does manage to infuse life into some startlingly different characters. You’ve got quite a few funny moments, the tone is light hearted through out and some genuinely unexpected ‘twists’. And I never thought I would be saying this, but my biggest fear from the film, what I thought would be the biggest liability, Harman Baweja, proved to be unfounded. He was actually good, not brilliant but good enough to impart some credibility and likeability to his character.


The story itself is interesting, derived from a book and a old Doordarshan serial called Mr Yogi. A Gujrati NRI (Harman) is called back to India and told by his family that he must get married within a few days, to enable him to inherit some land from his maternal grandfather and then pay off some debts the younger brother has racked up while dealing in shares. Harman agrees reluctantly and then decides that instead of meeting the 176 women who responded to his matrimonial ad (inserted by his mama, well played by Darshan Jariwala), he will meet only 12 women, one per zodiac sign and then decide.
So he meets them, twelve women all played by Priyanka and then in the end he chooses. Different sub plots involve a Mafiosi, who is one of the lenders. And also the mamu’s extra marital dalliance and his wife’s suspicions thereof.


There are some genuine surprises amongst the twelve characters played by Priyanka. She gets a lot of the detail right – slouching in some cases, oozing sensuality in others, being naïve in one character, a dominatrix in another and a bit flaky in a third. I don’t want to give anything away in terms of actually describing the zodiac roles as the element of surprise is what keeps you going through a lot of the film.
The humour, as mentioned above, is very good. There is one instance where Harman announces his name, Y B Patel, to get an unexpected response. Another where the innocent question, who is your favourite film star, gets a predictable response (‘Tom’) but its not who we think it is. There was a rich jeweller who proudly kept reiterating his shop name and the fact that it had no branches. And an interesting perspective was offered on Harman’s inability to eat a gola / chuski, with the whole NRI’s & their ubiquitous mineral water bottles being brought up. Then there was the time Harman swears ‘Jesus’ and is gently chided ‘is ghar main Krishna kehte hain’.


All this does get overshadowed by a few flaws. First and foremost is the length – the film is at least three and a half hours long. It could’ve done with fewer songs (there are thirteen), killed off some of the sub plots (they were unnecessary, especially the mamu’s extra marital one) and I can think of one or two more areas which could’ve been done without. The other big one is the ending – its very ordinary, nothing special and a weak end to walk out of the hall with. There could’ve been a twist there to make it more interesting. I and my wife thought of a couple which could’ve worked better. There are a few good songs but most otherwise actually halt the narrative and bloat the film.

I felt though, that it wasn’t a bad film. Its about arranged marriage and puts forward situations which most Indians can identify with, bring a smile to most people. Who hasn’t hesitatingly asked the girls parents for some time alone with the girl, only to be brutally rebuffed. Or had the girls parents answer all the questions. Or have the girl lie, on the orders of her parents, who feel only certain clothes and answers will please the soon-to-be green card holder. Or meet girls who are, well, err, humph, a bit crazy.


This is a film which has its heart in the right place but not its length…as the doc’s say, an overdose of anything is bad and in this case we got more than we bargained for…Someone needed to gently remind Ashutosh Gowariker that ‘Yeh dil Maange More’ doesn’t necessarily apply to all things and situations…

Love Story 2050

Rating : 3/10
Running Time : > 180 Minutes (definitely feels like an eternity)
Release Date : 4th July‘08
Director & Story : Harry Baweja ; Music : Anu Malik
Starring : Harman Baweja, Priyanka Chopra, Boman Irani

I think I know what happened here. The Baweja’s spent so much money on the Australian locales and special effects / animation on the 2050 part that they ran out of money and employed themselves as the story / screenplay writers and also forgot to employ an editor. The result is a movie reeking with inane, hammy dialogue (the next time Harman said 'I dont need luck, I have love' in that goofy way of his, I swear the entire audience would've lynched him) , a story crammed with unnecessary sub-plots and silly twists and turns. And I honestly think they put every scene they shot up on the screen. They forgot the editor or his scissors…

He-man type, xtreme sport loving Harman falls for a Mills & Boon type, pink colour loving, Priyanka who writes a diary, scribbles hearts, and names toys ‘Winkydinks'. Harman woo’s her by breakdancing and doing all the silly things that work only in movies and never in real life. He also immediately transforms from an alpha male character into a mushy, soppy mass of goo, who breaks into tears at the drop of a handkerchief. Enter an uncle, a cliched mad scientist type, who has a time machine, some more very silly twists and turns, and we’re off for Mumbai 2050.

There are three glaring examples of sub-plots which didn’t need to be there at all
 The two kids : Priyanka's siblings. Firstly I know of no kids like them, they’re irritating, try to be cute, are all senti-mushy-yucky and mouth sentences no self-respecting kids would. Secondly, there’s not one reason why they had to exist on-screen.
 Harman Baweja’s Dad : again, the whole father-son relationship thing was unnecessary. The story wouldn’t have changed one iota, if Harman had simply remarked ‘mera koi nahin hai’ and we would’ve saved fifteen minutes of screen time
 The whole Hoshi angle : an unnecessary caricature of a villain they introduced in the 2050 part of the film.

Come to think of it, they could’ve just shown Harman and Priyanka to be dating already, spared us the whole courtship thing and gone ahead directly with the 2050 part. So whats good about the film ? The locales in Australia are very nice, well-chosen and for a change its not about Sydney, the opera house and Sydney harbour but something more interesting. Priyanka is all pouty, but looks decent, even in red hair. And the futuristic animation / special effects are good. Not great, but good and with a couple of nice touches (the Kantabai hologram and the paan-making robot were interesting thoughts).

Harman can dance, look good but is overly made-up (the lip gloss is too prominent) and is very bad at dialogue delivery. His character, during courtship, is also shown doing a couple of things which are very silly (getting up while a rollercoaster is moving and stealing a toy) and kids may take up on that. And eets long, this movie, very painful and eets very, very long (some 30-40 people left midway into the second half, after having shelled out Rs200 for the preview).

I went more for the 2050 part but unfortunately it’s the Love Story part that dominates – they don’t let go even in the 2050 part and spoil that too. When I first heard the toy name ‘winkydinks’, my instinct was to get up and run. I didn’t obey it and sat through. Big mistake. Big. Huge !